RATATOUILLE

हाहा। निस मूवी। haha. nice movie. keyboard englished. its all about rats and cooks. wanna be rats wanting to be cooks. one important shit in the movie. rats try justifying their hatred towards man-kind at certain points. i can see it as an opposition to certain greater stereotyped man kind being opposed by justifying rats and remy acting as representative of men in ratworld. but the more important thing is how the remy is shown as a rebel in ratkind and how it manifies the rats towards the end of it. how remy meets accident of meeting mankind and rebel against the larger ratviews about manunkind. it realizes the rat thats sleeping inside it towards the end of the movie and starts to be a rat again by steeling its food and ideally serving the ratkind, though it shows the guilt here and there. this protagonist trying to go againts its real identity of rat -at one level- and his-male voice,though genitals not shown- wanna be human nature lets human audiences to feel for remy and identify the humandom. i read somewhere too that said remy charcter somehow was made to shoe feminine ways of acting. Well, i think it does, too.. by bringing in two opposing hoods or kinds-or many hoods(like brotherhood. ) like remy has manhood thru voice and womanhood thru movemnt. it becomes ambiguous., may be., may be i think so. this remy also acts as a cook-man- and a rat. thats is two opposing characters. man kills rats and rats dont like men, or rats are not supposed to like men if at all they possess human conciousness. thus remy turns out to be an ambiguity at different levels. ahhh! shit. why do i analyse it? chumma! hehe.. yes, remy resolves all ambiguities of movie by manifying the rats and rattifying the men. subversion takes place. tyring day. classing about schiz. yesterday no day before yester. i:bye. x:bye,bye. I: i shall enter your consciousness in next 24 hrs. i dont think there's something like consciousness. or my consciousness feels at this point thinks there's no such thing as consciousness. or may be everyone believes there's something called consciousness. or its all nothing but a dream. this motif of dream reoccuring so many times in head. forum was all exciting 2 days back., hh.chumma telling. yesterdays peoploxymoroning was good laughun. {ghun pronounced fun}. who rebels in a movie is sometimes mostly an unrebel if you look at core qualification of relliousness that is painted in mainstreams. i wanna quote polics of language here(not written by george orwell. not that thing)



human,
look at the word. human. words are not dependently originated with things or reality. hu-man. man is stressed. which indirectly signifies hu-man oppression. language is as beautiful as ugly.
Look at he and she. S-he cant exist without he. cause She is made of S, and He. what a politics?! oppression is so inbuilt into things. Look at 'man' and Wo-man. May be that means man with a Wo or womb. thus wo-men cant exist with out men, cause w,o,m,e,n - m,e,n = w,o
wooh! womb. that mean to say women is nothing but womb without men. destruction of individual identity through language.
there's one good thing in indian languages. as far as i know , in telugu or hindi or in other languages..
man and women exists as separate entities. telugu: athadu(he) , aamae (she). woah!nope... hahaha.. in telugu manishi means man, i think. theres no such word for woman. only athadu(he) , aamae (she) looks like individualistic. so, that means the women is not even seen as a women to certain extent, cause the word that signifies woman doesnt really exist in old telugu. then.! sanskrit. i dont think manu wouldnot have craeted more oppressive tools.
so stupid..
but son and daughter exists as separate entities, which probably tells the social life of those individuals at that context of being a son or a daughter. thus son, and daughter are separate individuals from the point of view of father/mother. Again!hahaha.. look at it: father, mother. father and mother are supposed to take care of children or whatsoever with reference to children. Look at the way the words are constructed: fat: her Mot: her.. hahah: her, refers to responsibilities of father and mother, evoking a feminine spirit in both the mother and father with respect to children.


bye me. buy me.

p.s-tea leaves today to the cultures pond.
all pallusseas mixed.

dream realism

lately no differenc between dreams r real again. i live therefore i exist or whattsoeverr. ahh! how i thought i'd move my fingers, while on my way. but i still move them. desperately ran here to type something. so that call diversion facilty is activated. its called deliberate fallacy. once i was reading this story about road and all that, i dunno when. but i read. i saw that ones slippers dunno in dream or reality. or in both, may be. and i read so much lately for exams, may be.. thats the most funniest thing i ve ever did: reading for exams. where they examine our reading. how i rhyme?! gabriel syme! he was the man called thursday be gkchectorton. Such a monologous dialog i indulge in! i think i heard this poem lately...

HYSTERIA

aS she laughed I was aware of becoming involved

in her laughter and being part of it, until her

teeth were only accidental stars with a talent

for squad-drill. I was drawn in by short gasps,

inhaled at each momentary recovery, lost finally

in the dark caverns of her throat, bruised by

the ripple of unseen muscles. An elderly waiter

with trembling hands was hurriedly spreading

a pink and white checked cloth over the rusty

green iron table, saying: "If the lady and

gentleman wish to take their tea in the garden,

if the lady and gentleman wish to take their

tea in the garden ..." I decided that if the

shaking of her breasts could be stopped, some of

the fragments of the afternoon might be collected,

and I concentrated my attention with careful

subtlety to this end.

i dunt wanna tell who wrote it, since he's dead famous: dead and famous. t.s.eliot. How much i show off?! deliberate fallacy! deliberate fallacy! i even show off by showing off that that i acknowledge my showing off, again and again! hehe.. its good fun. i ll call it tragic fallacy! cause here the writer meets a tragic end by deliberate showoff. if i'd take pleasure in this very act and amuse myself like i do now then i'd prefer not calling it tragic fallacy cause its not tragic fallacy and there's nothing like tragic fallacy and i just wanna wonder myself about tragic fallacy so that i would
keep intellecualising my acts and indulge my only reader: myself and sometimes you, also: to look upon to me! i like exposing my own crimes here. deliberaly exposethem so that i would feel shy and weep and creep to the depths of my consciounce and write something after that last and. this act ammuses me now and may be always. self apprisal thru selfish self denial and absurd intellectualisation. Mmme!! only if you know how shitty questions they were asked by future journalists who are already journalists cause they possessed mikes and papers and pens and air of postmodernity around them..
then only i would like to despise it.. may be, i should feel happy for it. cause its all show off, not real work.
J-why have you chosen nandagudi?
i-what shit? there's a big banner out there and she's just a cheif gest! and she felt for the cause n all that
she-..............-explains why rama married sita-
it rained and sunned properly. its crazy to not sleep for so many days and still start in the early morning and still attend it and walk around so much-20- and wet in rain and dont possess mony to reach home and feel greedy about agra peta and walk again thru nimhans and walk again and again around and around and wakeup and reach college!adventurous brain! haha.. why do yuo indulge me here many times. ok.ok..
i kept writing all this since yesterday and completed it now, just now..cause i tend to put a pulling stop. abba. . i irritate everything during times likethis. everything including me! sorry everyone i irritated , i did it as part unintentional fallacy. even now i irritate everything including ne, agaain by telling sorry. thats actually good fun. i am lying. no sitting. no wanting to lie and philosophize. anyways/.. its been many days sinnce i wrote this pericular story about a man who was called dog. he never looked like a dog, but that was just a name for him. he had no real name cause everyone thought its not a real name, though he also thought its not his real name. thats a funny thing, to have a name thats not real. dog always wanted to eat bones cause its just a dog but not man. but this real dog never wanted to eat bones cuz he's man. only if he saw his parents, he'd ve aasked them for his real name, though he never saw them. he never saw them cus he was blind. he was blind since he believed that one cant see without eyes. and may be.. thats why he was blind.
my real arguement here is that there's no such thing as... i'm tired again

why it rains?

it rains cuz i wanna eat gobi manchurian and chilli bajji in the evening when it rains
cause i want to take bath and comeout and take bath again.-today is threeday cuz i bathed thrice-
cuz i wanna sleep when it stops raining and run when rainable
lately evening i was reading this essay called is there an indian way of eating!? by kt.ravanujan.

its a very interesting article or whatever peace of shit you might want to call it. here is an excerpt from that essay only :
SodyoWhysky had an exercise for his costumers. He would give them a mundane dish like 'coffee/tea', 'idli/sambar' 'dosa/chutney' 'rice/rasam' etc etc...and ask them to eat it in forty different ways., using spoons, or fingers or other culturally significant and sintagmatic mechanisms. he would go to such an extent, asking his customers to eat idli and chutney with chopsticks.. My question is 'Is there an indian way of eating?', is a good one for such an exercise. Depending on where the dish is placed, it contains many questions at many juxtapositional levels-all of which are real questions-- asked again and again when people eat....

why it rains?

le saffeiare

college exam, exam college. thch. ting ting, ding ding. so so du du. timelessness spacelessness. nothingness. nada. voda. what da?
i finally met it today. what a thing it is?
i am suffering from amblomolioblia lately. its a funny diseace. its all about how amylases in your brain function on their own. may be eveyone suffers from it. i acknowledge it for a simple reason that it acknowledges me too. its not any big disease like cancer or anything. its not even like fever. fever atleast comes in thermometer. this one doesnt come in any meter. it might be discovered later after they ll want to discover it. this disease basically stems out from one's own illnottellwhat. ones own hesitation to lie and ones own hesitation to not lie. lie down on bed, i mean.. not m,e,a,n mean. fish mean. you would want to eat fish before you go to bed. thats a main symptom of this disease. no..no!thats not it! thats not the disease really like. the main symptom is that the infected person writes that he would want to eat fish before he goes to bed. thats a main symptom of this disease.or may be tellin about the symptom of the disease as being a main symptom is that the infected person writes that he would want to eat fish before he goes to bed. thats a main symptom of this disease.may be this is the actual symptom. No!for gods sake! thats not the reason.. where am i taking my fingers' brains? hah! ok! the real disease is mainly about the disease itself. that is to say that the discription of the disease itself is the disease. that is to say, if you have accidentally read this, then you'd also suffer from the same disease and on and so on and etc and etc.
this is no disease since it has no symptoms. and thats the disaese.
oh shit my invisible phone is vibrating./!godo!

..

i(2):walking on road..
he(6): waiting.
2when is she coming man?
6Five.
2shit its 5.50.
6so what? we ll wait for 10 more mins..
2what if she doesnt come even then?
6we ll go back..
2ok.. i ll also wait, chumma.
6that **** is not gonna come. i waited for 50 mins without studying any shit..
2ah. its ok even i dint study.
6ok..i ll order for water.
2wait i'm coming also. i need to buy ear phones
2do you know waiting for godot?
6msg a** back no..?
2phone: waiting for lady godot
6:shit man i wasted one hr..
2good
6look for old ladies..
2have you seen her
6yea.,.in the morning..i asked her to come at 5.. *****she saidshe ll be here by 5.
2wat time you came?
6around five
2may be she came at 5
6do you think she ll come sharp 5 and leave at 5:01
2may be...
6she's an indian man..
2so what?she might ve waited for you till 5:01
6*&$*%&%(%
2hah its ok. how does she look?
6*%^(%^
2how old is she?
6middle age. dark n fat man..
2iss she that one??
6no man!
2that aa?
6no man..
6*********'
6why should she tell 5??****
2i think she ll never come..
6wait 3 more mins man'
2yea..
6shit man..
2what?
6i wasted an hr
2so what? is she that one?
6pchp. ok we ll go off? 1ts 6.04
2yea.. bye man
6bye man
2yea..bye
6bye man
2wat if she come now?
6hah. terrible
2what if?
6no,...i don think she ll come..
2ok
6bye
2....walking...
6...walking...
2eeyyyy!
6thung. what man?
2is she the one?
6who?
2she
2she only
6no man..
2ok bye..

........

may be thats it

how does it matter...

how does it matter, that my....!
science is absurd in some ways, you see..
and so is nada. sans nada. and everything.
how does it matter that my....!
sometimes i tried too.
how could one not be tired?
though psycology exam would take place!tough it is. how can one not write it?

watched harry ptr.

waiting. waiting for godot.

all that we see or seem is but a dream.

...

GOETHE:There would be far less suffering amongst mankind, if men -- and God knows why they are so fashioned -- did not employ their imaginations so assiduously in recalling the memory of past sorrow, instead of bearing their present lot with equanimity.

home

in midst of all rain drops and phone calls, me started off in the usual expected way home. caught some bus which would drop a 70 kms away from my home at middle night. around 11 or twelve. as it did i had to catche a lorry home, within my 100 rupee note. over all travail costs 65+20+25+40!
65 for bang bus. 20 for lorry 25 for one'o clock auto and 40 for bangalore auto.
market(K.R, bangalore): people shouting. selling and buying and buying more to sell. and drenching in rain. mostly below lower middle class non-bangaloreans. all of us, swarming with the water that escaped the drinage cannals thru the rain. and cleanliness! hh. thats out of order here. may be thats the order of the time and place that passed. ,muslims with burkha especially women swarming too, thats a new word in the head-swarming- old thought. muslimised women with burkha under the public toilet roof, trying to escape the rain -too close to my head 'the air from their voices being felt by me. an old spaceless man, probably drunk or doped, standing next to me too close. his beard almost touching mine. many drunk smoked and smoking trying to ejoy the rainy evenig in between these smells and visuals. first you might be irritated. looking at so much of dirt dust smell and black waters. once you are in, i ll have no other option but to have it. see it and finally take pleasure from it like everyone else there. its in a way better. there are no stupid phony things said about, how the future would engulf your past through the faulty cognitions of your fellow beeings.
and after everything the bus dropped me at a place where a lorry would encounter me in a few mesages-smss- of time. not a bad travail. lorrys are always cheap and better.
early morning. no wake up. wakes up at 9ish. finds pomo for beginners book-fine-20rs. das chats. he wants me i ass or something like that. his childhood wish that was. cause of economic and social stimuli he becomes dr. sad. Dr.Freus would say, das early childhood would play a major role in him upon me. now he'd project it on to me and wants me write all sorts of funny competetive exams. let it be. i'd not, anyways. haha. afterall, he has freedom to dream.
kids in locality, -my 3rd class cousins friends n he-very fascinated to see me. they get me some bands to tie eachother and me. i joined their plan of watchin hptr in telugu. at 2'. they wanna go in auto.

moral of the day: love is immoral

what is truth

truth is freedom, freedom truth, ye! that is all one need to know!

i have been living here since time immemorial. freedom i spoke about is freedom of choice. choice i can make to choose or unchoose or abandon choosing itself and choose everything concieveable.

banana shit it is! :)

may be all of us are born free and limitedly free till the disire to freedom is lost and till we free ourselves from freedom. dumb crap! bull crap! social phenomenon hah! norms! its a big machine. all that everything might want us becom: wait! i ll tell. may be we, rebels would finally rebel against ourselves and end up becoming free from freedom itself! rebelling against rebelling itself. thats not true! thats never true! if at all thats true it'd continue cyclously till freedom is born again and again only at a higher levels, progressively!: absurdity it is. well framed absurdity!frameless absurdity. no its not! if its absurdity, what are you? i mean i? there is truth. there is freedom. and one day we would possess it. as absurdly as we loose it. we would start gaining it. freedom of thought is what we might look at. thought cant be like action. but how can i think of certain worldly action that can never exist? acting most freely, absolutely freely, would equate to acting absurdly, acting madly. that would be having complete most completest freeness. thats to act against everything, atleast to be able to act against everything or become a thing thats controlled by nothing: no relegion, no science, no natures laws and nothing! and to prove this to oneself, one might need to act in the most absurd ways possible. acting against everything, atleast to make oneself and everything else know, that the one is absoutely free in its most basic meaning. and proving it further would be the most absurdest thing to do. to irrationally give up freedom itself to realise that one is even free from freedom and everything and ultimately free to act against oneself and break the chains freedom has made for the one. thats real shit. i would not support that point! no i support it at a personnel level may be. no i dont. no i do. no no... absurdly free my hands are. my fingers are. free from myself! is it freedom!? nope! my rationale says sometimes no!, as scientificly as it says yes at times... Any ways. freedom is freedom to think free. that could be possible only after food water and other basics are fueled fulfilled in us. us, everyone.